Hello, Anxiety - Phum Viphurit

It was a typical morning commute—which is to say, I was driving like a complete maniac. Then, YouTube’s algorithm decided to bless me with this track. A cheerful, upbeat greeting to my own personal downward spiral.
At the time, I was living in survival mode 24/7. My body locked in a non-stop war with anxiety despite the daily benzos.

So, naturally, my first impression of this nonsensical song wasn't great.
"Hello?" More like "F U"

But I let it play. Mostly because I was too busy frantically switching lanes to beat traffic (I wasn't late; manic tension was my default setting).

By the end of the song, I couldn’t help but laugh at the ridiculous contrast between my chaos and this soundtrack, simultaneously blasting at full volume.

While I was constantly struggling and fighting against anxiety, the song had zero interest in controlling it or driving it out.
No bold declaration of "overcoming" anything.
No dramatic vow to conquer it either.

It was just a "Hello." An invitation to chat and stuff.
I cringed at the cheerful optimism of it all.
It was a concept I literally couldn’t fathom at the time.

I spent years after that battling the same familiar storm, and it finally started making sense not long ago.
Anxiety wasn't the villain I thought it was.
It was my body screaming, pleading for me to look at the parts of myself I'd been ignoring for way too long.
Without it, I probably would have kept choosing the safer options, postponing the uncomfortable conversations, and mistaking numbness for stability.

I still spend a good amount of time with this uninvited companion. It's never comfortable, but it always tells me something I need to hear.

So, my bad. You're still annoying, but you were never the enemy.